Wes Tooke, writer of the abysmal war video game disguised as a movie called Midway, is now on board to pen the script for the latest Thomas Crown Affair remake. Michael B. Jordan is starring in the pic, and will produce alongside Joe Russo and Anthony Russo. The film is a remake of the 1968 film of the same name – which was already remade once in 1999. This latest Thomas Crown remake has been knocking around since at least 2016. The story concerns a bored millionaire who decides to entertain himself by becoming a thief. And if there’s one thing we need right now it’s a movie about a bored billionaire ripping people off.

Deadline has the scoop that Wes Tooke is writing the latest Thomas Crown Affair remake. Tooke wrote Midway, a piece of shit movie that should be ashamed it even exists, so please excuse me if I don’t get too excited about this. Then there’s the overall premise of The Thomas Crowne Affair – a bored billionaire who decides to steal shit. In an era where the obscenely wealthy just keep growing richer and richer while the rest of us die in the gutter buried in credit card debt, I’m not entirely sure this is what we need right now.

And hey, Michael B. Jordan is a very good actor and hot as hell, so at the very least, we’ll have that. Deadline adds: “The property is high priority for the studio given how popular the IP is as well Jordan being one of the industry’s biggest stars.” And then after reading even more talk about “popular IP,” I went out and silently gazed at a body of water like a character in a Michael Mann movie.

The Thomas Crown Affairs

The original The Thomas Crown Affair, released in 1968, starred Steve McQueen and Faye Dunaway and was directed by Norman Jewison. McQueen played a billionaire who decides to treat his boredom by planning a bank robbery. Dunaway played an investigator for the bank’s insurance company who starts looking into Crown, and a cat-and-mouse game unfolds with romantic undertones.

The film was remade in 1999, with John McTiernan directing stars Pierce Brosnan and Rene Russo. The premise is mostly the same, but instead of a bank robbery, Thomas Crown is trying to pull off an art heist. To be fair, both films are pretty good. The 1999 film in particular has a nice sexy vibe that most modern Hollywood movies lack. So there’s that.

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